So finally the geezer who runs the health service has come clean and told us what we already know which is that you can forget being treated in A&E within four hours or whatever and you can’t get a hip replacement until your real one has dropped off.

The reason is bleeding obvious, namely, that you can’t get anywhere near a hospital ward ’cos it’s full of old people clogging up all the beds staring at the ceiling when they could easily be in their armchairs at home staring at their own walls.