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Idiot idea is a lesson to all Last week's Diary brought readers a harrowing insight into recruitment and retention strategies in Dr Haze's Circus of Horrors. And this week's update from the Big Top of the town hall world straddles a tightrope of equal absurdity. Albert the Idiot, of Albert and Friends Instant Circus [Oh, who else? Ed] – a teacher of social circus throughout Hammersmith in west London, feels too daunted to pioneer a circus free school and is instead establishing a circus skills curriculum. Clowning around: Albert the Idiot. Diary feels such shrinking timidity and lowered ambition does the ringmaster grave disservice. Surely, the egregious Toby Young – he of How to lose friends and alienate people fame – has proved, beyond all measure of a doubt, by his personal example and behaviour, that any ‘idiot' is capable of setting up a free school in the borough? The veteran clown – Albert, we hasten to add – says his pupils learn about Shakespeare, and even perform Wagner's Ring Cycle in 45 minutes through the medium of mime, in classes designed to ensure his young charges emerge more rounded as human beings. Gamely battling public ignorance and misconceptions, Albert the Idiot asserted: ‘A lot of people think of the circus and think tents, animals and scruffy travellers. But it's much wider than that.' Yes, Albert. Let's not forget bearded ladies, freaks and peculiar smells.

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The idiot idea

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